I Am a Swede

Ladies, gents.

Sometimes, I get upset because no one has posted anything on my Facebook wall in two days,  or no important emails or letters have been sent me. I think I need to talk this out.

It's normally when I have a long day or a hard week when I expect to find some funny MEME on my Facebook wall or an encouraging letter from a friend in the mail when I get home...like they're supposed to magically know what I'm going through and that I need something to make me feel better.

But...honestly...I'm just being selfish and shallow. Even if I tell my friends what how tired I am after a 6 hour shift at work or a test, why should I look to them as my sole access to comfort?

I take pride in being an introvert. But, in being an introvert (listening to my indie music, reading books, watching Doctor Who and Once Upon a Time, and shunning all society), I am basically in my own world where no one really knows what I'm thinking or how I'm feeling. I don't tell anyone my plans unless they ask me questions. I go to school and work, sometimes being out all day, and I expect everyone to jump on my Facebook page and post some meaningful, long message...with absolutely no reason! And, later, I'm just a gloomy, grumpy person... Like Eeyore. Because, you know, the world is a bad horrible place.

I'm just realizing how very low that is. If I expect this much from my friends, why don't I do it for them? It just confirms for me that I'm a pretty selfish person.

Being selfish is just silly. Remember in Veggie Tales with the tale of the Swede with all the strawberries and the Englishman with all the bananas? They were so proud that they had all of one or the other that they wouldn't even trade a strawberry for a banana. It's a hilarious skit, but it really reflects how being selfish helps nobody.  Not even me.



 
So, in future, I'm going to try to just take what each day gives, without expecting anything from anyone or anything extra for my work.

Okay. Okay, I feel a lot better now. Haha!


But, honestly, just
Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Sucessful Procrastination: My Weekend Away

School is almost over. Thanks be to heaven. You know that point in the school year when you just want to throw your textbooks across the room and rip out the pages in your note book? That's what school is like right now in the life of Ana. Grant it, I am only taking 1 class. But, I do know what it's like to have tons of homework. Thankfully, I just finished my very last piece of real homework. Now all I have to do is study for the final. Hooray....! It's okay guys, I can do this.

Anyway, I thought I would take this opportune moment to tell you all about my wonderful weekend adventures and very successful procrastination. I drove to Denver! By myself!

The purpose of my going to Denver was to visit a very special someone. Puddles. Pillow. Klutz. Turtle #2. Spazz. Gimli. ...Bri. Whatever you want to call her. She's my best friend, and we had been planning for me to visit her at college for, like, evah. 

I had driven to Denver before (to see Colton Dixon, because he's wonderful), but that time I had my handy dandy helper in the car, Tabi, who very calmly got me to where we needed to be. This time, I was alone....

I don't mind driving alone. In fact, I prefer it. But the thing is, I have a very irrational fear of the freeway. I literally kept both hands on the steering wheel the whole time.- - but I was fine. The roads were clear and I only got lost once!

When I got there, I was bombarded with a hug from Bri, and smiles from her roommates. We passed the afternoon watching Disney movies and making paper snowflakes. In the evening, we went to a concert where one of Bri's roommates, Annie, was performing. It was a wonderful concert, and the church was decked out in sparkling Christmas lights (which made Ana very happy indeed). After the concert we went back to the dorm...and had a Nerf war! I'm not sure who won that, or who was on who's team...but whatevs. It was spectacular. We then played a game and afterwords got some much needed sleep.

The next day was as lazy as lazy can be. I woke up with a slight cold, so Annie, Bri and I went to the store to buy some medicine. I bought some chocolate chips and strawberries to make...chocolate covered strawberries. Then we went home, did some homework (I say "some" because I only got through 15 of the 100+ math problems I had to get done), watched more Disney movies and then commenced to make the chocolate covered strawberries. They were a success.

Soon after that, the dear and lovely Melody came over! We had a wonderful conversation and listened to Christmas music. Then **trumpet fanfare**, James came over! ....that entrance may have been a little exaggerated, but James is really one cool dude.

We all talked for a long time about lots of things. Later, Bri made pancakes with chocolate chips for dinner. Scrumptious, I tell you. She is quite the cook ;) After we ate, James, Bri and I went over to James's dorm to watch The Return of the King with his roommates, because they have a good sound system and a flat screen TV (an improvement compared to the old box TV in Bri's dorm.). We watched the movie with very little talking throughout, and when it was over we just talked about life for an hour. Bri and I left their dorm at midnight, then ended up not going to bed until 2am-ish. 'Twas exciting!

I went home on the freeway in the morning, only got honked at once, and finally sat down to do my homework, which is when I felt like throwing my textbook across the room, which is how this post began.

There's really no moral to this story. Only that I had a great time, even though I had to spend 6 hours doing homework Sunday night.

More posts to come! It's almost Christmas!
Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Forget the Normal. Let's Rock This Ship!

So, you know how I said that life was getting back to normal? Turns out that only lasted 48 hours. Today was one of the most stressful days I've had in weeks! It started this morning when I turned in to the parking lot of my brother's school.--

The school had this marvelous idea that they were going to block the entry way to the school. What a swell idea, guys. There I was, turning left into what I thought was a completely vacant road when BAM! orange cones exploded! (I didn't exactly run the orange cones over...but it was a scary ordeal.) I couldn't back out of this predicament. literally. I have Tedd move the cones so I can get through, and we safely make it into a parking space.

I park, Tedd walks away, and I prepare to leave. I put the car in reverse...nope...reverse...nope... C'mon Louis! (Louis is the name of my car)... Louis didn't want to go in reverse. I turned him off, then on again, then put him in reverse...reverse. Nope. Ohhhhh noooo. My car is broken. I called Tedd to come back and help me get Louis to go backwards, but he can't get him to go either.

Now, there's something you have to understand. I'm supposed to babysit this morning at 8:20! It's 8:12! and it takes 10 minutes to get there! I called the kids' mom to let her know that I was going to be late if I got there at all. I call my dad, but he doesn't answer his phone, I call my mom, and she doesn't answer her phone either. Great. I'm stuck. But wait! Tedd got Louis to work!!! Yay! I hurriedly call the kids' mom again to let her know I'm on my way, then make the what would have been 10 minute trip a 5 minute rush. I got there on time. Phew!

The next 2 hours of the morning go splendidly. I help the young kids with school, and have a generally good time. Then around 10, we set off to piano lessons. I get a little lost, but I get there on time, sort of. Then I take the boys to a local coffee shop to wait for the girls at their piano lesson. We have 45 minutes. Okay. I can do this. This is my kind of place, this coffee shop. There's a hipster in the corner and good music is playing. Relax. Drink coffee.

The 45 minutes pass unexpectedly quick, and we're back in the car sooner than I'd like to be. It's now 11:15. I turn on the car, ask if everyone is buckled, then put the car in...reverse...reverse. LOUIS NO! I try to keep calm and tell the kids that my car is temporarily disabled. Then I call my dad, who tries his very best to walk me through some things to try to get Louis started. Nothing is working, and the girls are waiting at piano lessons for me to pick them up! I nearly have a heart attack, but resort to an emotional breakdown instead. Since I can't get Louis to work, I call the kids' mom to ask if there was any possible way that she could come and pick us up, which, thankfully, she could. She came over, and took the oldest, Mollie, and I to the college. By this time, 11:55, I'm doing all I can not to cry because all of this was very stressful for me. I can handle one mishap with the car...but two? When I'm supposed to be babysitting? It's not okay for me. I felt sick.

12:00. I walk into the school, hoping desperately that there would be someone there who I could talk things out with. Which, there kind of was. My friend Kaely was there, so I went and sat with her--unfortunately, she had to go get something out of somebody's car, so she left me with my new buddy, Nick. What's that? Yes. I did make a new friend. Who says I'm too introverted to make friends? I can talk to people. When I feel like it.

An hour passed, and I still feel sick. The chips that Tedd got me from the college café do not look appetizing at all...so I give them to Sheree. Paul gets out of class and says he can take me home, because I'm in no state to go to class. Haha!

The rest of the day went pretty well, but I still felt sick, and I was about to take a nap when my Mom called me and told me that I needed to take my grandma back to her house so I cold have the car tomorrow for work. I guess a nap is now out of the question =P

...I guess the point that I'm leading up to is, don't ever think that you have life figured out. I didn't see this emotional day coming, (but the water-proof mascara was a lifesaver). Life is unpredictable. I may have overreacted a bit, but it only proves my point even more. I thought today was going to be normal and boring. I didn't put a positive attitude on, because I honestly thought I wouldn't need it. If I would have thought about the positive things that were happening throughout the day, I wouldn't be so upset about the negative.

One of the kids I was babysitting today said his memory verse to me- 1 Peter 5:7. Cast all your anxiety on Him, because He cares for you. I had a lot of anxiety today, but I didn't even think of giving it to God because I wanted to wallow in self pity instead looking for joy and peace in Him. Sometimes we don't even realize what we're holding back for ourselves until we look back at it. I know anxiety isn't something that we would normally want to hold on to, but doesn't it get us attention sometimes? We strive for attention because we need it. It's natural. But, especially in my case, I tend to turn a negative experience into my own personal pity party. I get really sarcastic and try to get people to feel sorry for me. But, guys, we have all the attention we could ever hope for in God. He cares for YOU. Shouldn't that be enough?

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Finally Getting Back to Normal

It has certainly been a long time since I've visited the writing area of my brain, but I'm back. Oh, goodness, so much has happened since the last time I wrote. One thing that comes to mind is getting comfortable at work.

I've been working at Bath & Body Works for almost 2 months. To be honest, I really didn't think I would like working there a whole lot, but the I'm beginning to second guess that {{Play happy music here}}. I think there is a difference between liking work and liking going to work. I don't like the physical act of lugging myself to work, but as soon as I'm there, I really do enjoy myself. I have bought way too many things with my employee discount.... C'mon guys, who can't resist the last set of Sweet Cinnamon Pumpkin? It only comes out once a year! Anyway, just so you guys know, I like work. You should defiantly come and visit me sometime. ;)

Another thing that has been happening since I wrote is that I still have a B in my Algebra class at college! I've never done well in math (with the exception of Geometry), so this is quite an accomplishment for me!

Most recently, Pinocchio had it's eight showings. Eight showings. Did I say EIGHT showings?! Haha! I don't think I've been that tired in a very long time. Grant it, I did stay up past midnight every night, regardless of what time I got home, but hey, I had a stack of black and white movies that I had to get through...so...that's kind of an excuse. For Pinocchio, we had four school showings. There is not a better feeling than asking a little child who their favorite character was, and them saying "you". Aww. So. cute. We also had four public showings- Saturday night, a whole clan of my girls and most of my family came to support me <3 I love my girls. And, I also got a very happy surprise from a friend that had me smiling the rest of the night =D haha! You know who you are ;) Thanks for the chocolate!

So, hopefully, I'll be able to post weekly again... I know I have time now! =D Pinocchio was basically taking over my life, but now that it's over, I have nothing in my life...besides, you know, school...and work.

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

P.S. Local Colorado radio stations are already playing Christmas music...not sure how I feel about that. Haha! I love Christmas! But, there's a line. Even for me. There's not even snow on the ground! I'm just gonna stick to Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin for now. That's cozy enough without singing "Santa Clause is Coming to Town". I need to stop writing. Good day.

Stressing.

Hey guys! Whew, it's been a while. Life has gotten pretty busy! Which, incidentally, is what I'm supposed to talk about this week. A few weeks ago, I asked you guys to ask me questions for me to answer. I got two, and I answered the first one in my last blog (check it out). Now I get to answer the second one!

The question is: "What do you do when you feel super overwhelmed with life? Like, you are super busy, and you want to just take a breather...how do you relax?"

Honestly, I stuggle with this. I get stressed really easily. This past week, I was trying to juggle eight lessons of math and a three page essay, and I was really overwhelmed with it. But, you know how people say the first step to fixing a problem is admitting that you have a problem? I know that I get stressed easily, so I try my hardest to plan things out so I only have to do a little each day. Sometimes I even work ahead.

But, sometimes life catches up with me, or some unexpected things come up, and I don't realize all the things I have to get done. It's times like those that I just have to sit down and figure things out. I listen to worship music, because, literally, worshiping makes anybody feel better. Also, I make a list of things I have to get done. Making a list either makes me feel a lot better, or overwhelms me even more. Haha! But more often than not, the list is a good thing.

I think the best thing to do is to just not overthink the things you're doing,. Take your time, and remember that even if you take a 15 minute break from something, it will still get done.

So, that's what I do. I hope that answers the question adequately. ;)

Changing sujects, IT'S FALL!!!! Break out the fuzzy scarves and sweaters!
Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

It's Humpday!!!

Oh my gosh! It's Wednesday, and I haven't posted this week? Whassup with that? Well, honestly, I forgot =P {{I'm so embarrassed}} But, look on the bright side of life. I'm posting now! Aren't you happy that you get some Ana today? ...If this is inconvienient, I'm so sorry. I know you set apart time specifically to read my posts every Monday ;) Get over it.

Last week, I asked you guys to ask me some questions about life so I could have something to write about. I got two really difficult questions to answer....

#1: "If you could meet any celebrity...other than you-know-who...who would it be and why and what questions would you ask them?"

Okay, the answer to this questions really depends on who you mean by "you-know-who". I'm assuming it's either Joseph Gordon-Levitt or David Tennant.  I'm not entirely sure I would really like to meet either of those guys. They are grand actors, to be sure, but I don't agree with some of the things they stand for. So, now that we've got that out of the way, who would I want to meet? Hmmm.... I have been thinking about this all week, really. I even made a list of my favorite actors. And I am aware that "celebrity" doesn't just pertain to actors, but that's my thinking process. For a long time, I couldn't decide between a compilation of 42 actors who I adore. That number turned into 41 when I remembered that Heath Ledger had died (a very, very sad fact I might add). I began to narrow the list down by asking myself, "would I want to spend the whole day with this person?" --this ruled out three people (Matt Bomer [because it would be odd to spend the day with a gorgeous gay man :/], Nicole Kidman [she's just too perfect. I think I would die.], and Cate Blanchett [I would feel like I was with the Queen, really. I would just not be able to speak.].)

As you can tell, it took me a very long time to narrow my list to just one person. In the end, it was a contest between Andrew Garfield and Emma Stone (you can't break those two up. It would be wrong.), Arthur Darvill, Aaron Tviet, and Samantha Barks. I then decided that I wouldn't want to be an awkward third wheel with Emma and Andrew, so I crossed them out. I then noticed that my last three were all amazing Broadway singers. Arthur Darvill now starring in my favorite musical, Once, Samantha Barks as Eponine in both the stage and film version of Les Miserables, and Aaron Tveit, well, Aaron was in a lot of musicals (Next to Normal, Wicked, Catch Me if You Can) as well as playing Enjolras in Les Miserables (plus he's not bad looking ;]).

Dumbfounded, I stared at my dwindling list...then I decided. Aaron. Haha! There is logic behind this, I promise! Looking at Aaron's acting history, he started really small. He grew up around theatre, like me, and took it from there. He went to college for voice performance, but then decided to go back into musical theatre. He just took it step by step, without flaunting his talents like other actors might have done, until he was pretty well known in gerneral showbiz.

 I would like to meet Aaron Tveit because he's a really genuine and humble guy. Once he said, "Awards are not something that I measure my work by. I've been so fortunate, and I've gotten to do such terrific things, that it seems petty to look back and say, 'Oh, I should have gotten that prize.' I've been so blessed, it's hard to look back and think anything but that, so I have no disappointments."

I would probably ask him how much patience it took to get 'to the top', so to speak. I've been wanting to get into television for a while, but I just see an overwhelming mass of things I would have to go through to get there. It seems like he got there without trying too hard. :)

{{I'm going to answer the other question I got next week. If you have anything else you want me to write about, let me know!}}

So, now you know who I'd like to meet someday =) And, I've decided to throw out my list of 42 actors (and what they've been in, in case you don't know their names) so you know what a hard process this was--

Guys:
Allen Leech (Tom Branson in Downton Abbey)
John Krasinski (Jim Halpert in The Office)
Matthew Goode (Declan O'Callahan in Leap Year)
Jeremy Renner (Hawkeye in The Avengers)
Matthew McNulty (Fisher Bloom in BBC's Larkrise to Candleford)
Zachary Levi (Flynn Rider in Tangled)
Liam Hemsworth (Gale Hawthorne in The Hunger Games)
Matt Bomer (Neal Caffrey in White Collar)
David Tennant (The 10th Doctor in BBC's Doctor Who)
Jonny Lee Miller (Sherlock Holmes in Elementary)
Harrison Ford (Han Solo in Star Wars)
Heath Ledger (William/Ulrich in A Knight's Tale)
Andrew Garfield (Peter Parker in The Amazing Spiderman)
Arthur Darvill (Rory Williams in BBC's Doctor Who)
Simon Woods (Charles Bingley in Pride and Prejudice)
Bradley James (Arthur Pendragon in BBC's Merlin)
JJ Fields (Henry Tilney in Masterpiece Theatre's Northanger Abbey)
Colin Morgan (Merlin in BBC's Merlin)
Benedict Cumberbatch (Sherlock Holmes in BBC's Sherlock)
Martin Freeman (Bilbo Baggins in The Hobbit)
Joseph Gordon-Levitt (Arthur in Inception)
Lee Pace (Ned in ABC's Pushing Daisies)
Chris Pine (James T. Kirk in Star Trek)
Aaron Tveit (Enjolras in Les Miserables)
Matt Smith (The 11th Doctor in BBC's Doctor Who)
Hugh Jackman (The Wolverine/Logan in X-Men)
Simon Baker (Patrick Jane in The Mentalist)

Girls:
Emma Stone (Gwen Stacey in The Amazing Spiderman)
Emma Watson (Hermione Granger in Harry Potter)
Sandra Bullock (if you don't know who she is, you're not my friend ;])
Karen Gillian (Amy Pond in BBC's Doctor Who)
Amy Adams (Giselle in Disney's Enchanted)
Cate Blanchett (Galadriel in The Lord of the Rings)
Romola Garai (Emma Woodhouse in BBC's Emma)
Katie McGrath (Morgana Pendragon in BBC's Merlin)
Maggie Smith (Professor McGonagall in Harry Potter)
Jennifer Larwence (Katniss Everdeen in The Hunger Games)
Samantha Barks (Eponine in Les Miserables)
Judy Dench (Once again, if you don't know who this is, go read something else)
Idina Menzel (Elphaba in Broadway's Original cast of Wicked)
Emily Blunt (Queen Victoria in The Young Victoria)
Nicole Kidman (Dr. Chase Meridian in Batman Forever)

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Just, You Know, Things.

Okay guys, I've tried three times to try to write something deep and godly today, but it's not working. Sooo, time to tell you three things that have been swimming around in my head. Enjoy.

1.) How crazy was Ezekiel?? I'm reading Ezekiel for the first time in forever, and really paying attention to the things the Holy Spirit told Ezekiel to do to symbolize the sins of Jerusalem and Judah. These were crazy things! If you go and read Ezekiel 4 and 5 you'll get what I'm talking about. I won't go into detail here, but realizing that Ezekiel did exactly what God was telling him to do is so mind boggling. Laying on his left side for more than a year bearing the sins of Jerusalem, and shaving his head and beard with a sharp sword? This guy was intense. Seriously, guys, go read Ezekiel. It will change you.

2.) I have 1000+ views on my blog! It's only been like three months, and every time I post, I know at least 200 people look at my blog. It might be the same person looking at it over and over, but at least I know at least some people are enjoying my writing. ....or they just think my writing is so bad, they get a kick out of reading it. Haha! Nah, that's not it. Is it?

I have a mission for those of you who are reading this. You see that comment section on the bottom of this post? Yeah, that one. Leave a question there for me to answer this week. It can be simple or challenging. I need some new things to write about, and I'd love to hear from you! (FYI, I felt like a youtuber when I wrote that. But I really need some inspiration! Ask some questions!)

3.) I have to be off book for my play on Thursday. Gah! I only have 10 lines, but I'm still freaking! I'll be okay. Don't worry about me. That's all.

I love you guys.
Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

P.S. I start my job on Sunday!!!

A Bucket of Blessings

I had a really good week. I don't know if you've ever felt like God just splashed a big bucket of blessing on top of your head, but it's a pretty good feeling. If you read my post from last week, you'll notice that last Monday was really good. Tuesday, I did homework (because I'm a good girl and don't procrastinate). It was a rather uneventful day. Wednesday, I saw some of my favorite people at school (you know who you are). Thursday, again, did homework, and prepared for my job interview which was to take place on Friday. Friday, now Friday was a long, exciting day.

I woke up earlier than I had been all week =P Took my Mum to work, my brother to school, then went home to get ready for my interview. I.was.so.nervous. This was my first interview ever, so I think I had good cause to be nervous. Answers to questions that weren't even asked at the interview were wracking through my brain, like this: "What is your greatest weakness?" Do I have a weakness? Or, are weaknesses uniquenesses? Should I be proud of my weakness?, "What can you bring, that is new, to our store? Well, I'm a pretty perky person. No, no, Ana! They do not want to hear that! Think of something more professional! Ummm.... Thinking of something was more difficult than I thought it would be. I've decided that my mind really doesn't have a professional thinking process. I mean, really, I can't even say statistics. That's a word that people use in the professional realm every day, right? But, moving on with my story, I was really nervous for this interview. Even listening to Relient K didn't help me feel better! And, that's saying something.

I ended up having to park about a mile away from the store that I needed to be at. Not really a mile, but when you're wearing high-heels, walking as far as I did is practically like going up the incline. I got there about 10 minutes early (Not a bad time ;]). I actually made friends with one of the people that I was interviewing with! I figured, it's a group interview. Better to make friends than to make it a competition, right? So, we talked for a long while until the manager was ready to speak to us.

The interview wasn't really harmful. Not so much an interview as an orientation. She basically told us what the job included, what she expected of us, and asked if we had questions. Basically, she said all she had to do was make sure our references were up to par, and she would get back to us by the 3rd, which is tomorrow!! Turns out I was stressing out for no big reason. Haha! My fun week didn't end there.

I went to frozen yogurt with my clan because Bri was home from college for a few days. It was super duper funn.

Buuut, Sunday, Tabitha, Brooke and I took a road trip up to Lakewood to see Bri at college, and also see this wonderful music artist who goes by the name Colton Dixon. His concert was phenomenal. Everything was so God focused and worshipful, it didn't even feel like a concert. I think we all came away happier than when we went in. Sunday was a good day. I only got lost once! Score!

Seriously though, God dumped a bucket of blessings on me. I'm so happy that He's in my life :)

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.

~Ana

P.S. I got that job. Win. :D

School Started

It's not very often that I get very excited about stuff like this, but today, good things happened at school.

This past week, I have been so stressed about getting into the class that I wanted. The class was full, but I figured I could go to that class and see if I could get in anyway. For my back-up, I had signed up for a class at the Falcon College, close to where I live. The problem was, I would need a car to get to that College anyway-- thus, having to take my Mum to work and my brother to school in the mornings, driving the whole half hour back to Falcon, go to class, then come back into town and pick up my Mom and brother. That being said, if I had a class in Falcon, it would pretty much be a disaster for me. Me would be no happy if I had to go to that class. But I don't! I actually got into the class I wanted! It was a very welcome surprise.

After finding out that I could go to the class I wanted, I had to go to the office and register for it. If you know me, I really don't like talking to strangers. At all. So, standing in line for 15 minutes with strangers, waiting to talk to a stranger, was really intimidating. I kept praying God, please give me a splurge of outgoing-ness! I really need to sound intelligent. ...It's really funny when I tell God exactly what I need, and He gives me exactly that. When I went up to talk to the lady at the desk, I felt like the words coming out of my mouth weren't even mine. It was like God gave me a different mind. I walked out of that room really confident and happy =). Then, I got Sheree to wait in the bookstore line with me a-very-long-time. When I got to the check out, oops! Sorry! They can't take my debit card because it's in my Mother's name, not mine. What? They directed me to an ATM so I could get some cash, but the ATM wasn't working. Aw, man! I went back to the check out and told them that it wasn't working. They sent me to the TCA building ATM, so I grabbed a couple of friends, and headed over there. Oh, no! They're closed! Grrrr! I went back to the check out...told them that TCA was closed...and they made and exception for me! They let me use my Mum's card to pay for my book. So, that made me happy =) Like, really happy.

So, reviewing, I got into the class that I wanted, I talked to a stranger, and I got my textbook after very much stressing. But, that's not all the happy things that happened today-

Guys, I have a job interview. Hahaha! After 20+ stinking applications this summer, I finally got a breakthrough! Bath and Body Works is the place. Maybe you've heard of it? It's the place that sells yummy smelling things. Mmhmm. I'm going in on Friday! I'm so happy!!!

So, I like today. Today was good. Life is good. God is good. Chocolate's good too. =)

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Tuesday Special #4

Oh, my goodness! I totally forgot about posting yesterday and today! And today's almost over! I'm not feeling particularly creative this night, so I'll just talk about something that makes me happy.

Episode #4- Scarves and Adventures with Dragons

I.love.scarves. Some of my friends might say that I'm a little obsessed with them. Over the summer I have acquired 6 scarves. My most recent addition was received on Monday. A bright neon lime green scarf. It's really bright green. Like, not even funny bright green. But, I love it! Thanks bestie! Scarves are wonderful. Just saying. There are few days that I walk out of the house without one. I guess I'm sort of like Linus in the Peanuts Comics. The way he carries his blanket everywhere is like my relationship with my scarves. They're my safety blankets =). So, if you're ever stumped on what to get me for Christmas, you can be sure that by giving me a scarf (or chocolate. Chocolate is good.), you'll pretty much be my favorite person. Haha! I wonder what a person who's addicted to scarves is called.... A scarfaholic? A scarvesaholic. A scarfer?  Hmmmm.... Someone should look that up and tell me, cos now I'm super curious. But, I don't really want to look it up on Google right now. Surprise me!

Annnnd, now we come to my adventure with dragons! {{Insert dramatic music here}} Dun dun dun! There I was, walking around at Cottonwood Creek Park, when out of the sidewalk, there rose a giant dragon! Probably the size of a large zebra! (Wow. Listening to The Hobbit soundtrack really made that intense!) Okay, okay, okay. It wasn't a real dragon. It was a chalk dragon. In fact, it was a dragon that I drew! My best friend and I decided to find out who could draw a better dragon, since we were bored with drawing bunnies and snails and bubbles (our chalk bubbles were the bomb! They were all different colours and they were stuck together!). A time past. My best friend finished her dragon first. Black (typical), with fire coming out of his mouth and a mace for a tale. It was a pretty ferocious looking dragon! Then... there was mine. Blue (good colour), with big wings, a spiky tale, smoke coming out of his nose,...and a purple tooth. I think I pretty much lost the fear factor of the dragon as soon as that tooth appeared. Haha! It was a really fun day though =).

Dun dun duuuunnn!!!! Happy Tuesday!!!

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.

~Ana

Summer's Almost Over =(

Life is getting busy again. My brother starts school next week, and my best friend leaves for school next week (I’ll miss you!), some of my friends have already started school (I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.) And, I start school in two weeks! Ah! Life is suddenly defined my schedule. Unlike, in the summer, when my life was planned by the days I could have the car....

Now, there’s Awana, school, plays, jobs, and sports you have to strategically plan out so they don’t bump into each other-eventually, you remember how each day runs.  It becomes a habit, and a routine. Where’s God in your schedule? Is He in there at all? This is something that I struggle with a lot, especially when I just want to sleeeeep. But, I find that by spending a little bit of time with Him in the morning, my day goes much better (cliché, but true). I kind of got out of the habit of talking to Jesus as much as I did in the beginning of the summer, so I have to be really diligent about getting my bible out every day. I’m gonna tell you, once I get into the habit of talking with Jesus and reading my Bible every day, it feels really odd if I don’t do it. It’s like an addiction, but a good addiction…like coffee. Nope, I guess coffee isn’t a good addiction-well, it’s good, but it’s not a good addiction. Ahem. Moving on.  

15 minutes is only about 7% of an hour, so-

I challenge you, in this first month of not-summer-anymore-life; put your Bible somewhere where you’ll see it when you wake up, like on your bedside table, and dedicate 7% of one hour to Jesus. Or if you feel like you need time to wake up a little bit, put it next to your coffee maker so you can read it while you’re waiting for your perk (Overcome that coffee addiction with a Jesus addiction!). Or leave it open on your counter, so you can read it when you eat breakfast. I’m gonna do it too! {{Life’s more fun with Jesus}}
Don’t be afraid to sing to Jesus- He loves to hear our voices. Here’s my post on worship and a great example of how all God’s creations worship Him. Enjoy =)
http://godiswithinher-shewillnotfail.blogspot.com/2013/07/a-lack-of-things-to-talk-about.html
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7zWKm-LZWm4

That’s it =)
Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

P.S. 41 days till Autumn =D
P. P. S. My other blog- Character Development of Fare Madrina

http://mylifeasfaremadrina.blogspot.com/

 

An Unexpected Surprise

I was planning on talking about this on Monday, but it's simply to awesome to hold it back. Plus, I have a shiny new blog format, and I had to try it out. I'm freaking going to college this semester after all! I was completely ready to accept that I wasn't going to go to school this year, because I didn't have a job, thus, no money to pay for said school. But! My granddad called me a few days ago and said that he would pay for me to take some classes this year! It was such an unexpected, but very welcome, surprise. I was completely unprepared, and all I could do was do my best not to start crying while on the phone! I never thought there would be a day when I would be actually excited to go to school...but, kids, college is important, and it's one step closer to my 'future' (I know there's another way to put that, but I'm tired, and I can't think of it right now....)! So that's happy. I'm really, truly, thankful for this blessing =)

On a completely different, unrelated, unimportant, utterly random note, and it's really cheesy: I've been watching Christmas movies and listening to Christmas music. And, now you all hate me. Christmas makes me happy. There are 138 days until Christmas. I feel like I need to tell you guys these facts because, well, really it's because I didn't want to post just one paragraph. So now I have two!

That's all. Good day to you. I hope you like the new blog format!

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

P.S. This is my 10th post! I'm so proud of me!

P.P.S. I was cast in a play today. That's all.
 

 

A Little Bit About Myself

Hey guys! I'm a little bit at a loss of things to talk about. Not that God hasn't done great things this week, because He has, believe me. But, I've decided to give you a bit of my testimony. It's something that I've felt like I've needed to share for a while. Have fun!

I've been a believer for as long as I can remember. My Dad was the worship leader at a church in Wisconsin, and my earliest memories are of my brothers and I playing Mother May I, and Red Light, Green Light in the church lobby, waiting for everybody to leave. I was a shy girl. I didn't like to talk to people, and strangers were my biggest fear. And I stayed that way for a long time.

We moved to Colorado when I was five years old. I don't remember much of the first years we lived here, except for a few things like my first day in Awana as a Sparky, getting our first dog (our beautiful golden retriever-border collie mix), Shadow, and of course, moving into our Falcon house.

Life went on pretty smoothly until I was about 12 years old, when my parents separated. It was then when I started not to portray any feelings whatsoever towards circumstances that would have otherwise made me feel angry, or upset, or uncomfortable. I just slapped a smile on my face and told myself that it would all be fine. Which, is fine, to an extent. I think if I didn't push my feelings down the way I did when I didn't want to respond, I wouldn't be able to feel the way I do about things now. It wasn't until I reached high school that I started really relying on God for everything. Slowly, I let my emotions show. I learned that it was okay to be upset about things, just so long as I didn't hold onto the anger or spite so long that it became a part of me. In my sophomore and junior years, I went through periods of depression or melancholiness, mostly because I felt like I had a ton of weight on my shoulders.

My parents divorced soon after my 16th birthday. After that, I felt like it was my job to fix everything, and it was hard. I felt like Jesus had stepped out of my life, but I think that's what happens in a lot of Christian walks when the road get more bumpy than we're used to. It took much prayer, many talks with friends, mentors, and small groups, but I started to not be the shy, happy-go-lucky girl that I was so used to being. I became confident, more relaxed, and just a generally happy person (and not because I felt like I needed to be happy, but because I didn't have any reason to be upset.)

I can't say how or exactly when it happened, but I know in this past year, I have found so much joy in Jesus. He's inside me, and He makes me the perky, quirky sort of girl that I am. I have more peace than I've ever had before in my life. One of my friends, a great teacher, said that something like this peace doesn't mean the absence of struggle; it's the presence of victory in spite of the struggle. And, it's so true. I won't pretend that I don't have struggles. I can name many. It's just that I know that I can conquer those struggles with Jesus at my side.

And that's my testimony. It's very abridged, but it gets my point across, I think. Maybe next week I'll be able to write something more than my life story, but in the mean time-

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.

~Ana

 

Tuesday Special #3

My mother told me that I need to be more creative with my time. And, no, decorating journals and watching Doctor Who at the same time is not the same thing as being creative.... So! I've decided to write something instead of watching television tonight =) And, it's still Tuesday, so it's another Tuesday Special! Yippy!

Episode #3- The Eiffel Tower and Ireland

I've developed a mild obsession this year for the Eiffel Tower in Paris, France. I literally can count--let's see--eight things in my line of sight that have the Eiffel Tower on them. It's not an all together practical thing to fancy, but, dude, there are literally over 1600 steps to the very top. That's a stinking lot of stairs! It's been around for 124 years and it's still one of the most toured places in the world. It's just a very large pyramidal iron pillar, yes, and it is not one of the wonders of the world, but it is so rich in history. Over 200,000,000 people have visited it since it was opened in the March of 1889. Can you imagine looking at the same thing people have admired for decades? Why, F. Scott Fitzgerald and Ernest Hemingway will have looked at that towering, well, tower. Anyhow, it's just been a fixation of mine recently. I hope you don't mind my rambling. Moving on.

Ireland. Maybe it would be a better idea not to talk about Ireland.... Nah, I'm gonna do it anyway. Ireland is my dreamland. I've never been there, but even pictures of it gets me daydreaming.

Don't even get me started on Irish accents. I adore Irish accents, and that's all I'm gonna say before I get really embarrassed. It's not just the landscapes and the way people talk in Ireland that makes me really admire it, it's the culture. Their way of life is so much simpler, so much more whole (grant it, they know how to have a good drink, but I try to look past that). I'm really drawn to Ireland, too, because it is in need of Jesus' love. If I were ever to go on a missions trip, I would go to Ireland. I'm not gonna go any deeper with that, because, well, because it's not a Monday. If you want to know more about how I feel for Ireland, ask me about it sometime! =D

Man! It's getting late. I'm going to sign off now. Happy Tuesday to you all!
And, just in case you happen live in New Zealand, happy Wednesday too! ;)

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

God's Love Language

Well, it's Monday once again...and I don't know what to talk about. Thinking back on my week, I spent it mostly in my room watching Primeval and British period dramas. But! I did knit a scarf and I actually cleaned my room! Well, it was clean for a few days anyway.... It was just a rather uneventful week--until I went to church! Recently, going to church has had a big impact on my daily perspective on life. It's always great going to church, don't get me wrong! But, sometimes it feels like I hear the same message and the same worship songs over and over and over again until I tune out. It's always nice to hear a new outlook and voice on things. For example:

This was put much more eloquently in worship this weekend, but it really changed my whole perspective on how we need to show our love to God. (Thank you Seth, if you ever read this....)

Have you ever thought about what your love language is? Personally, mine is giving. I love making people things and receiveing a smile and a hug in return. And, I love receiving gifts too. If you come and give me a bar of dark chocolate for no good reason, you might just become my favorite person. But, moving on... we usually give love in the way we like to receive it. Have you ever thought about God's love language?? Go ahead and look up Psalm 98-- the whole of my church congregation was challenged to do exactly what that chapter says. For example; verse 1: Sing to the Lord a new song, for he has done marvelous things. This is God's love language. He loves to hear our voices in new (even if off key) melodies that are of our own making. Words that are from our own imagination. From our own perspective. The chapter goes on, Shout for joy to the Lord, all the earth! How often do you shout or whistle or scream or laugh with joy when you're alone with Jesus? For myself? Not very often, in fact, probably never. But this is how God loves to be loved! It will be unbearably uncomfortable (especially for me because I'm not very apt to do things out of my tiny comfort zone), but, in the words of my bestest friend, I need to want God's will...more than I want to be comfortable!  Seth called this idea "Doing the Word". Not just reading and listening to what God says...but doing it! That was basically the theme of church this week: getting off our bums and really obeying God's word. It's our job to find God's will, not wait for it to happen (that was also put much more eloquently in the message at church...). Worship. Pray. Obey.

Annnd, that's what I have for today. I challenge you to do the Word this week (and by challenging you, I'm challenging myself). Turn to a page in Psalms and worship just like it says. Love Jesus in the way He loves you. He sings songs over you (Zephaniah 3:17)! Why not sing your own, original, unique, beautiful songs to Him?

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

The Called

Last weekend, my Pastor at church said something that stuck in my head. He said "God doesn't call the gifted, He gifts the called." It stood out to me because sometimes I feel like I'm really not qualified to do some things. Especially in places of leadership. Just like Moses. But, in these past few months, God has shown me that I have more potential than I thought.

It started in March, when I was preparing to give a speech at a national bible convention in Chicago called Awana Summit. I wasn't at all nervous about it until about an hour before I had to give my speech. It was a competition, so to speak, with a small scolarship attached to the best score. And, honestly, even with all the encouraging praises I got at practices...I doubted myself (which is ironic, because my speech was about doubt). There were tears and twitching and shaking and much prayer. But, as soon as I steped up to do my speech, all of it left. God brought me through and helped me give my speech the best I had given it. I even won a gold medal for it (no scolarship, but still, a blessing)! That one experience has shown me that God, even when I'm shaking inside (and out), helps me to look confident and strong. He called me to write and give that speech, and he gifted me so that I could give it strongly.

Moving on to my next exciting Jesus moment. At the beginning of this month, I auditioned my my church worship team, and next to my Summit speech, this was possibly one of the most nerve wracking experiences of my life. I know I can sing. Being on the Awana worhsip team has taught me that much, but then, I never had to audition for the Awana worship team. Once again, I doubted my ability. But, the audition went rather smoothly. I didn't end up getting on the main team. But they told me that they wanted me to gain a little more experience on the Youth worship team. If God hadn't wanted me to be on the team, he wouldn't have put me on it. But, He gifted my voice with the ability to sing, and He calls me to use it for His glory.

One last experience, very recently, of how God gifted me... and this is one I wouldn't have expected.
I've never believed that I was very good with kids. But, this last week, I was asked to nanny a family of six kids (officially, I only had to watch four of them, but there were times when I had to watch the little ones as well). God told me immediatly that I was supposed to do it, so I took the job. But, a few hours after I accepted the job...I began protesting. What if they don't like me? What do I do if one of them gets hurt? Or sick? What if I can't get them to do what I ask??? These thoughts went running through my mind, and I started to panic! Nevertheless...God told me to suck it up, becasue he called me to do this, and he would help me through it. And, suprisingly (but not raelly suprisingly) I was fine. The kids were...um....semi-obeidient, there were some cuts and bruises (and even a lose tooth!) but God gave me the wisdom to deal with them. No one got sick. And, when I left on the last day, there were many pouty faces, which sort of shows that they did like me! I was so thankful to God that he gifted me enough to help out that family. I had a blast with them!

So...next time you think that you're not qualified to do what God asks you, just remember that God doesn't call the gifted. He gifts the called. And He'll help you get through whatever you're facing.

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Tuesday Special! #2

Welp. It appears as if I missed yet another Monday post :P Sorry about that. But, now you get another Tuesday Special!!!

Episode 2- New Music and Doctor Who

I don't know about you, but getting new music is one thing that makes me exceedingly happy. I always ask for a few albums and iTunes money for Christmas and my birthday, but sadly, I rarly got any. Until this past year! Between my graduation and my birthday money, I've gotten at least $100 worth of music, and it is bliss. Haha! I have gotten many comments on how diverse my music taste is. I love the folk and indie bands that no one has heard of the best (Beta Radio, Mumford and Sons, Hudson Taylor, The Lumineers), but I also love the old, big band, stuff (Frank Sinatra, Nat King Cole, Louis Armstrong), and, of course, stuff like OneRepublic, Fun. (I was a fan of Fun. before they were on the radio! Haha! I'm so hipster...), and my resent obsession, Relient K. I won't even go into my collection of worship music, because I think your brain might just explode from the sheer awesomeness of it. Oh! And musicals. I have a weekness for musicals. ;) Haha! As you can tell, I'm pretty much a freak when it comes to my music. And I just got a whole bunch of new stuff from my bestie; it's making me really happy!!!

On a completely different note, those of you who know me moderately well know that I'm an avid Doctor Who fan. I could talk for hours about it! But, I will limit myself to one paragraph...maybe. Haha! I just finished watching seasons 2 and 3 (again) in about two weeks. That's pretty ridiculous now that I think about it =\. I always end up watching the most scary episodes right before I go to bed, which is not wise, and I would advise against it. For those of you who watch Doctor Who, you must know that David Tennant is the best Doctor (and let the argument begin...), there's nothing you can say that will make me change my mind. End of story. Doctor Who is just one of those shows that makes me feel happy! And, I thought that you should know that. Anyhow, that's all I feel like I can write without going into graphic details about my opinion on every single episode ever filmed. So, I'll say good day to you.

Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Being Single. It'll be Worth the Wait.

 

Heh. I know. Really generic title, but it's something that's been on my mind for a while.... I've never been on a date (shocking, I know), but I am in a relationship. It's not the relationship that you would normally think of, because I don't have a boyfriend either (mind blown!). I'm in a relationship with my saviour, Jesus. Don't tune out! I know it's super duper cliche', but it really is true! But, let me tell you, it is not easy. It's plain weird to be the awkward third, fifth, (and occasionally seventh) wheel when I hang out with friends. There are days when I literally beg God to send me a Flynn Rider (He has great hair ;]).

Awww! =) But, alas, I've come to a conclusion (But I'm not going to tell you yet. Ha!).

There are times in my life when I feel really alone, and I feel like that loneliness can only be filled by a person, preferably a special man friend. But if that is what I continually look for in life to make me happy, can I truly be called a worshiper of God? (Food for thought) What does it say about my relationship with God if I'm constantly looking for something to fill a hole in my heart, and I don't think Jesus is sufficient enough, and if I'm not letting myself be full of Christ?

So, my conclusion is this: I don't need to search for my perfect man. God already has my perfect man out there, chosen specifically for me. And if I keep seeking out Jesus, and His will...well, who knows who will pop into my story. It could just be my Flynn Rider! Haha! And let me tell you, that'll be worth the wait!

That's it for now.
Be Bold. Be Blessed. Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Tuesday Special #1

Since I didn’t post yesterday, and rather than waiting a whole other week, I’ve decided to give you a surprise! Happy Tuesday everybody! On these said Tuesday Specials (See subject line), instead of writing one of my long, and rather deep (Don’t argue. They are deep), posts, these Tuesday ones will be my rant about the things in life that make me happy- like pink mountains, with blue grass, and green and purple zebras. Tuesday Specials will give you a little glimpse into my head.  Here we go!!!

Episode 1- Bible Studies and Starbucks Baristas

Going to my Bible Study always makes me happy. Of course we probably do all the things that other girls do in Bible Studies, but I’m not sure that all those bible studies has a very special girl who gives you a belated birthday present that contains German gummy bears and jelly beans. What can get better than eating German gummy bears and jelly beans in Bible Study with some of your favorite people?! Not much can top that, my friends. Not much. Also, after Bible Study, I always feel really good driving home. What wrong with blasting Colton Dixon’s beautiful music in your car and singing at the top of your lungs? Who cares if people give you funny looks…and the police pull you over asking you to say the abc’s backwards? I’m kidding, I’m kidding. I didn’t get pulled over. I did get some very odd looks from the people who were sharing the road with me…but I didn’t care, because I was on a Jesus high and nothing could get me low.  And that’s what I have to say for Bible Study nights. Moving on!

Have you ever noticed how nice Starbucks baristas are? I don’t go to Starbucks very often, maybe 3 or 4 times a month, but every time I go there the baristas just smile whole-heartedly while I take a very long look at the menu, then order what I get every time (take note: I always get a caramel macchiato-creature of habit here). I appreciate them. Thank you Starbucks baristas for making my day that much better! I was at Starbucks this afternoon, sitting outside, people watching, alone...when suddenly I remembered that it wasn’t just the baristas at Starbucks that make me happy, it’s the music too! Frank Sinatra, Dean Martin, Andy Williams, Louis Armstrong, Ella Fitzgerald, and Nat King Cole! The kind of music that makes you feel like you’ve stepped back in time, or snuggle in a blanket during a thunderstorm. That type of music is my type of music.  =) And that’s all I have to say for Starbucks. If ever you’re there, thank a barista for being so terrific.

Until next time!

Be Bold, Be Blessed, Be Bodacious

~Ana

What Would You Take?

Sarah Young says in her book, "Jesus Today", that if the world were perfect, we would never recieve God's all embracing comfort. I think a lot of us here in Colorado witnessed the truth to that this past week. Almost 500 families lost thier homes to the Black Forest fire. My stomach was twisted and I felt sick for the first three days as the evacuation line drew dangerously close to our neighborhood. I even went in to panic-mode one night and packed all of my most cherished things (selfish, I know, I know). When I was packing, I felt like God hit me in the head with a baseball bat and I thought, if the fire really did come to engulf my house, and I could only take one thing...what would I take? And I sat back to look at my room, and God gave me his eyes (just for a second), and he showed me that all the things in my room...were just things. They were replacable. Heck, even a Bible can be replaced. God let me see that all the things, ever, in the history of the world, in the history of the whole universe, added together, could never ever compare to his love for every person in the world. you. me. and especially those aching with loss.
So, back to what Sarah Young says. If the world were perfect, which it is most definitly not, we would not recieve any of God's comforts. Let's see...Learning Experience #2!

Recently, I've been having some bad days. I've been applying to jobs for three weeks...and I havn't heard anything from any of them. It's quite a tedious task. I finished applications #11,12, and 13 today. Anyway. Back to the subject. I'm at a point where I'm getting upset because things aren't going the way I want them to. Lukily for me, I'm still reading "Life Without Limits" by Nick Vujicic, and he has a whole chapter dedicated to different types of attitudes to take on in different types of scenarios. (An attitude of gratitude, even when you feel like you have nothing going for you. An attitude of action, when you feel like you absolutly cannot move on.) Even though it may not seem like it, these have been a blessing to me. One of God's comforts is showing us that everything will turn out, so long as we don't sit back and do nothing. In a perfect world, we wouldn't have that knowledge. We'd be stuck in our fantacy lifestyles. I still have to overcome the frustrations of not getting a job when I really, really want one....I'm trying to have an attitude of gratitude, because I know that God will give me what I need. And, an attitude of action, because God knows exactly when He's going to give me a job, even if I beg him to give it to me sooner ;)

That's all I have for now- Joshua 1:9: Be strong and of good courage. Do not be afraid nor be dismayed. For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.

Be Bold.
Be Blessed.
Be Bodacious.
~Ana

Just the Beginning

This is it! I finally graduated from High School! Whew. there's something about the fact that I'm done makes me even more aware of how much more life I have to live. The end of High School signifies, in my book, the beginning of a whole new adventure! And that's why I've decided to make this blog. To record all my adventures, learning experiences, stressful choices, and perfectly thrilling Jesus stories.

I was doing my devotions a couple of mornings ago (I'm reading this book called "Life Without Limits" by Nick Vujicic), and I came across this passage, "You want to keep striving, keep growing, keep giving all you have to give so that, in the end, you can look back and say, I gave it my best shot." That really opened my mind to a whole new realm of possible outcomes for my life. I realized that I can either pray really hard, sit back, and wait for God to do something. Or, I can pray, seek, learn, and discover God's plan was right in front of me the whole time! You know that part from Pirates of the Carribean when one of the Pirates says, "Take what you can, give nothing back"? That saying, for us Christians anyway, should be the exact oppisite of our life purpose. The apostle Paul calls us to give all we can to God, standing firm in our beliefs, and take nothing back (1 Cor. 15:58).

I can't pretend that it's the easiest thing to do-giving all I have to God. It's not easy at all. It's down-right problematical to have to get up and do something instead of doing what I want, lolly gagging, and waiting for God to pop up and say "Hey! Here's my answer to that question that you asked me!" But, I can guarentee that through learning, through prayer, God will show you what you need to do.

Learning Experience #1
I don't like hurting people's feelings. No, no. I hate hurting people's feelings. I like to be on everybody's good side =) I'm a nice person. Sometimes too nice. But there are consequences to being too nice sometimes. A few weeks ago, I got asked out on a date...by someone who I really wasn't interested in. He was a super duper sweet guy, don't get me wrong, but I didn't know him. At all. He asked me over email (where he got my email address, I have no idea), so I had time to think it over. I had a conversation with Jesus, and this is what was said, "Would it really be so bad?","Yes, Ana, yes it would. It would be awkward, and uncomfortable, and you would feel quweezzy (Jesus says 'quweezzy'), and did I mention it would be awkward? I have something better for you.","But I don't want to hurt his feelings!"

Now, I knew that Jesus didn't want me to go, and He wanted me to tell the boy, but I decided about 5 hours after I got the email that I wasn't even going to respond. The boy would get the hint...sooner or later. I felt sick all evening. I talked with my mum about it. Tried my hardest to watch a movie, but that just made matters worse. Exasperated, I called up my best friend for some advice. She said exactly what my mum and, yes, Jesus had been telling me. Just say 'no'. No?.....No? The word "no" is not in my vocabulary! I'd like to go and stick my head in a wall than say "no"!

After a restless night, I took a walk to my local Starbucks (nothing like a cup of good coffee to get my mind racing) to read my bible and talk to Jesus. All the while, I could feel the tension in my heart releasing, and I heard Jesus' gentle voice in the back of my head saying "It's all gonna be okay." I came across this verse that morning, "God is within her, she will not fail; God will help her" (Psalm 46:5). Then everything sorted out. With God, I wrote up a short, precise response to the boy that stated firmly but nicely that I was not interested, I had my brother click the 'send' button, then it was done. The peace I felt after was such a relief. I'm so thankful fo this learning experience. Through it I have learned that it's okay to say 'no' sometimes. Also, I learned that no matter how I try to pull away from something God wants me, and me alone, to do, there's no getting away from it. He'll place reminders and step ladders in my way so that I have no choice but to go up them. And that is really where He'll take you too! God will never leave you in a scenario in which you are degraded. He'll always lift you to Himself.

And, that's all I have for now.
Be bold, be blessed, be bodacious.
~Ana